Telling Yourself “No For Now”
When was the last time you listened to a leadership podcast, read a blog, or attended a conference and heard a great leader offer great advice, but walked away thinking it wasn’t for you?
Several years ago I listened as my boss, Andy Stanley, taught a leadership lesson on saying “No for now.” The basis of his teaching was saying “No for now” doesn’t mean “No forever.” According to Andy, as a leader, you should be willing to say “No for now.” He gave examples from his past.
– When he had young children and was asked to speak at other churches or conferences, he declined. “No for now.”
– When he was launching North Point Community Church, he didn’t accept any offers to travel. “No for now.”
– He decided that being home at 4:00pm was best for his wife and family, so for a season, he would not meet with anyone in the late afternoon or evening. “No for now.”
Andy then explained how he can say “yes” to the things today that he consistently declined a decade ago. His season of life has changed. His children are grown. His leadership at North Point requires a different commitment.
In Andy’s mind, saying “No for now” did not mean “No forever.”
There’s one fallacy in this principle: It only works when people are asking you to do things.
The 17 Best Books I Read in 2014
I love to know what friends and peers are reading. I’m always on the lookout for great books to stretch my theology, skills, and leadership ability.
With that in mind, here are the books I loved the most from 2014. Note these are my favorites… I’ll spare you the full list!
25’ish Books I Hope to Read in 2015
I have a love/hate relationship with goals – especially New Year’s goals. But one area where I always try to set goals is in personal and leadership development. More specifically, I try to begin every year with a list of books to read.
And this year is no different. Here are the books I’m planning to read in 2015.
Does Working for the Weekend Work Against YOU?
AT A GLANCE…
Read this if…
You sense there is a connection between time and momentum.
This post in one sentence…
Does time away take away? From our momentum? From our progress? From our purpose?
How you can engage…
Create a “Can’t Stop Won’t Stop” list of your own and share it with me in the comments below. And share this post with others who might need to consider the idea, too.
POST:
Is it good to take time off?
I know, I know… sounds like a trick question. But let’s think critically for a moment. Is taking time off ALWAYS a good thing? Loverboy sang “everybody’s working for the weekend…, “ but does working for the weekend ever work against us?
An Observation that Initiated the Question:
I recently took time away from writing. Outside of a few random posts, I didn’t blog for a couple of months. I didn’t really write anything. I won’t bore you with the reasons, but I was excited to get started again. I felt ready to pounce on a blog post like a lion stalking prey. I was mentally refreshed (or so I thought). I assumed two months away would allow me to come back with ideas upon ideas. It was going to be a landslide of great writing. After all, every time I write, I use up an idea; so taking a few months off should in theory create a backlog of options.
Discovering What You Were Made To Do.
What do you really love to do? I mean REALLY love?
If you’re anything like me, that question provokes thoughts, not necessarily of roles or positions, but of specific moments. Moments in time where you felt alive. Experiences that you would love to relive again. Tasks where time seemed nonexistent. Hours past as minutes.
This is an idea that I’m processing currently. Most of the time people introduce ideas once they are solidified in their mind. That’s not the case here. I’m still marinating, but here is where I am (at least right now…).
The strengths movement ushered in by Marcus Buckingham and Donald Clifton has brought questions like this to the surface more now than ever. It’s an important question for us each to answer. Finding our sweet spot makes us both happier and more productive, which benefits both our organization and us. We should be more successful working out of something we love. Eventually, we might even find the perfect seat on Jim Collin’s Good to Great bus. Feels like we are building to an inspirational “never work another day in your life” quote, huh?
5 Ways You Can Better Question Leadership Decisions
Have you ever questioned a decision made by leadership? Maybe EVERY decision made by leadership?
My guess is everyone’s answer is “yes” to the first question! For those of you who answered “yes” to both, we’ll write another post for you soon!
Everybody at some point questions those in leadership. In some cases the questions are warranted. But in every case there is a danger in not knowing what we don’t know. Let me explain by pointing to a recent news article published in the NY Times, and then we will circle back and try to learn something together.
The Church DOESN’T Just Want My Money?
“The church just wants my money!”
How do you overcome that obstacle as a church leader?
Undo the past twenty years of Christianity? Too bad that’s not an option! One simple solution is to stop talking about money, which certainly would fix the problem. Of course, that might create many more (unless you aren’t concerned with missing pay cycles!). If you never taught or mentioned money, nobody would complain and nobody would give. Worse, nobody would begin to trust God with their financial life. Yet, when you talk about money, people both complain and leave.
It’s unfortunate the perception exists. But it is for legitimate reasons. We as church leaders have done a terrible job talking about money and stewarding what we’ve received.
Setting Our Hearts and Minds on the Things of Leadership
Is there anything that tends to replace Christ in your life as a leader?
Just an early warning – it’s about to get personal (at least for me!). I’ve been processing this idea in my own life a lot lately. It’s a process so by nature somewhat incomplete. Here’s where I’m at today:
Paul, in Colossians 3, provides an important statement about the life of a believer. As a Christian, Paul’s instruction is a beautiful reminder of our new life that is found in Jesus. But I believe it has significant leadership implications – ones that I’ve struggled to maintain at times.
Here’s what Paul wrote to the believers in Colossae:
Colossians 3:1-4 (NIV)
1 Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. 2 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. 3 For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. 4 When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.
The church has become enamored with leadership. For good reason. Quality leadership is missing in far too many churches around the globe. Yes, pastors are shepherds. Yes, pastors are disciple-makers. But pastors are also leaders, and the church needs more great leaders. Without quality leadership, the church suffers. This will sound blasphemous, but a great leader can grow a church crowd without Jesus. Great leaders can make things happen on their own. Great leaders can attract followers.
Go Ahead… Say It Out Loud: “I Don’t Know”
Are you comfortable with the phrase, “I don’t know?”
I’m not … but I’m learning to familiarize myself quickly. Luckily, leading a growing organization provides many opportunities to practice!
I used to avoid this statement like I avoided waking up for my 8am Art History class in college (I never went!). I’m becoming more comfortable today, though. It’s not that I know less today than a few years ago. At some point my age may cause that to be true. Rather, I’m just becoming more comfortable accepting and acknowledging what “I don’t know.”
Here is the problem. When I was a younger leader, I assumed admitting my lack of insight would undermine my leadership influence. I wanted to be seen as a thought leader. I wanted the promotion. I wanted the next opportunity. And I believed the path to the leadership promise land was paved by answers, expertise, and confidence.
Unfortunately, pretending to know all the answers led me to over-promise and under-deliver. In case you don’t know, that’s NOT the best method to promotions and opportunities.
“Slow Down” And Know That I Am God
Do you have a love-hate relationship with stillness?
I sure do! To me, the concept of “stillness” is attractive, yet unproductive. I love to get things done. I like to work hard. I like to accomplish stuff. Which brings me to a piece of Scripture from David that has always bothered me. If I could remove a verse from the Bible, Psalms 46:10 might be in my top 10.
I wish Psalms 46:10 read “Slow down, and know that I am God.” It doesn’t. It says, “Be still,” but slowing down seems like a better choice – or at least an option to catch my breath before getting something else accomplished. Being still is difficult for me. It’s counterintuitive. I’m a progress addict, so the thought of being still makes me nauseous. How can I make progress if I’m busy not being busy?
I’ve spent much of my life believing that progress and productivity is correlated to pace. I’ve heard people claim that being busy didn’t necessarily equal productivity (work smarter, not harder, they would always say), but in the end, I thought those people were just a tad lazy. The kind of people who looked forward to taking naps more than making a difference (BTW – I hate naps!). While I now realize that is not completely true, I still have a hard time completely trusting that stillness is helpful or necessary.
